my dad and this other guy were fighting over who would go on a date with my mom in high school so they put their forearms together and my mom dropped a lit cigarette in between them and said “first one to pull away loses” and my dad still has a little scar
June 2013
When I become a parent, my advice will go like this:
“He broke my heart”:
“I got an F”:
“I had a fight with my best friend”:
“I have exams soon and I don’t know where to start”:
sometimes i’m like “wow i hate myself and want to die” but on good days i’m just like “wow i hate myself”
what if
the whole “mirror mirror on the wall who’s the fairest of them all” thing was created so that
little girls would do it in the mirror and
when their reflection didn’t change they’d see how beautiful they are
ok since christmas is over lets just skip to summer
in Australia christmas is in summer
i don;t even know why i stay up late all i do is find new ways to hate myself
let’s be friends with benefits. the benefits? you get to be friends with me
